Lightning In A Bottle
or: the Dark Art of the main title theme song
Full disclosure here guys: I have a Spotify playlist called KWAN.
If any of you have seen Jerry Maguire, you’ll know what I’m talking about here.
Now, I’m not sure that’s the correct spelling for it, or if there even is one, but case in point- ‘KWAN’ according to Cuba Gooding Jr. in his scintillating portrayal of American football up-and-comer with a chunky chip on his shoulder Rod Tidwell, represents all we can possibly aspire to in life.
‘You know, some dudes may have the coin, but they’ll never have the kwan. It means love, respect, community, and the dollars too, the entire package. The… kwan.’
Anyway- the second song on my KWAN playlist is ‘Succession- Main Title Theme’ by Nicholas Britell.
The first is New Lands by Justice- because I know you were wondering.
Have you ever tried to hit the road for a run or get in the weights room while listening to the Succession main theme on your headphones? If not- g’head. Give it a go. Not only do you feel like you can run a marathon or lift a ton- you feel like you’re pretty much ready to take over the entire friggin’ world altogether. Right now. In nothing but your workout gear and armed with a half full (because it’s DEFINITELY half full) 500ml bottle of Highland Spring. And maybe grab that kettlebell with you, because- heck. We mean business over here.
It got me thinking though- just how important is a good title sequence intro song?
For me- it all started back in the early noughties with my friend Alex. Alex is a dude, by the way. I’m a dude. Just for context. So Alex and I would have these cheese and wine nights, and watch that week’s episode of Sex And The City. True story. I have fond memories of trying to finish toasting the baguette just in time for the titles to begin. To sync the popping of the cork to the [Ggghhhh…….] static white noise of the HBO logo. Whatever it took NOT to miss that intro song.
I am certain now, after many years of consideration, that it all comes down to some form of ‘Pavlovian effect’ of TV series.
Quick bit of nerdery here. It’s called ‘classical conditioning’ and the basic premise is to use a neutral stimulus connected to a reward. In Pavlov’s case, he experimented with a dog. The stimulus was a metronome, and the reward was food- red meat, more specifically. Pavlov activated the metronome, and then fed the dog the meat. After a while, he noticed that the dog would start salivating upon hearing the metronome alone- regardless of whether the food would follow or not.
And that’s what was going on in my brain. I was basically acting like a dog.
You know that when you hear that first couple of chords- you already start salivating at what’s to come. It puts you in the right state of mind. Marketers would call this a good ‘buying environment’- creating a stimulating mood by framing, funneling the watcher into the right headspace. It’s an apéritif of sorts. It gives you a taste of what’s to come, while whetting your appetite and preparing you for it at the same time. The shampooing before the haircut.
Now, while we’re on the subject of dogs, my mind meandered to that classic ‘assumption’. You know the one? That dogs look like their owners. And I went even deeper down that particular rabbit hole- ever noticed how the majority of people ‘look exactly like their names’?
Is there something similar going on with intros and their series?
Well, let’s look at what science has to say.
When it comes to the dog question, studies suggest that we may be a little more narcissistic than we would like to believe, and therefore choose our pooch in our image. Sort of like a canine mini-me.
As for the names, there’s a couple of interesting theories. One proposes that we ‘grow into our name.’ Because of cultural stereotypes that people attach to different names (from characters in books or TV shows, for example), we then subconsciously and over time alter our image to match those cultural norms and expectations.
A second theory talks about the ‘bouba/ kiki’ effect. This has its roots in a 1929 study by German psychologist Wolfgang Kohler. He presented people in the Canary Islands (thus eliminating all language bias) two shapes: one rounded and one triangular, and asked them which one they would call ‘baluba’ and which one looked more like a ‘takete’.
So according to this study, we may be doing a similar thing with names and faces, by matching names that sound a certain way with facial features that ‘look’ like those sounds.
Let’s put this to the test.
Do you think that Jon Hamm would have been as believable if his name were, I don’t know- Jak Cheese?
It seems to have worked out alright for “Jack” Nicholson, whose real name is actually John. Would he look like a John to you, had he not changed his name?
What if Aaron Paul was Paul Aaron- would we still think he looked exactly like a Paul?
So if we apply the same principle to the title sequence themes- why do they begin, after a while, to sound exactly like they were destined to be in the intro for that show and that show alone? Like there was no way in hell they would have worked for another series.
Think about it.
This is particularly easy to explain when the theme wasn’t expressly commissioned for the show. When an already existing piece of music was used to match that specific TV series.
Let’s take the Sopranos and The Wire, to illustrate.
This one’s a valid comparison because both theme songs already existed prior to the shows, and were therefore chosen by the showrunners to complement their programs.
What makes it even more fun is this little piece of trivia- coincidentally, both songs come from bands with ‘Alabama’ in their names.
The Blind Boys of Alabama performed a rendition of Tom Waits’ ‘Way Down In The Hole’, which is the song used on The Wire intro. Meanwhile, Alabama 3 were the creators of ‘Woke Up This Morning’, famously picked up by David Chase for his show The Sopranos.
Now, if we were to interchange these two songs and their intros- would they still work?
We actually tested it. See for yourself here.
Would the iconic Game of Thrones theme work for, say, LOTR: The Rings Of Power?
It seems like there may be a ‘double whammy’ at play here.
So yes, the same as people allegedly choose their dogs in alignment with their own image- these songs were selected because they reflect the show’s identity so well. But then, as we become more familiar with the series’ themes, narratives and various character arcs, we may be pouring all of those qualities back into the theme song’s cauldron. As if gifting it with magical powers- we’re injecting the tune with this potent mixture of meaning and emotion, thus turning it into a true potion. A heady elixir that we are, by now, hopelessly addicted to. Lightning in a bottle.
But whether the song was commissioned or it already existed, I believe it’s got a very important mission to fulfill.
At its best, a great title theme song manages to capture the essence of the show. It’s today’s version of an overture. A separate piece that does a great job at introducing some of the themes that will unfold within the series’ episodes.
In fact, some of them capture the essence so well, they almost write themselves.
Take an iconic one as an example- Mission Impossible.
As Lalo Schifrin, the song’s composer explained- the first thing he did was nail the concept of the song. Boil it down to its essence. Once he managed that, it was all smooth sailing.
He started from the Morse Code for the initials M.I. which is “- – ⸱ ⸱ ” where a dot is one beat and a dash is one and a half beats, thus giving a bar of five beats, which exactly matches the underlying rhythm.
Schifrin compared his writing process to writing a letter: “When you write a letter, you don’t have to think what grammar or what syntaxes you’re going to use, you just write a letter. And that’s the way it came.” He estimated that he wrote it in about three minutes.
How do you begin to explain to somebody who’s never seen it, what Mission Impossible is without going ‘DUN-D-DUN-D-DAAH-DAAH-DUN-D-DUN-D-DAAH-DAAAAH….dee-dh-deeehhh, dee-dh-deeehhh’ going into the little flute bit while fully picturing the burning fuse sequence in the intro.
When the composer manages to capture the show’s spirit so masterfully, the song almost takes on a life of its own. It doesn’t just complement the show anymore- it becomes an integral part of the watching experience. Sometimes going as far as to survive the show it accompanies, and entering the popular vernacular on its own merits.
So, to close things off- I thought it’d be fun to bring you a few of my favourites.
I’ve split them into categories to make things a bit more dynamic. Please let me know in the comments which ones I’ve missed, and how you feel about the ones below.
Happy listening & as always- keep it fresh!
MB @ London Got Juice.
——————–BUT BEFORE, A PALATE CLEANSER!——————-
“One Note Wonders”
Let’s start with some easy ones.
You know these- they could feature in any radio or TV show that requires people to ‘guess the song’ as quickly as possible.
Seinfeld
Maybe all it takes is one note off that slap bass (which, smug fact, is actually a synth) for you to recognise this one. It’s impossible not to imagine a vague representation of New York City- all honking yellow taxis and steaming manholes, as your mind inevitably starts conjuring up Jerry Seinfeld bits, leading with that high-pitched question in his now infamous Kermit the Frog meets John Travolta twang. Totally unforgettable. Pure essence.
Curb Your Enthusiasm
The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree here. Curb seems to have taken more than one page out of Seinfeld’s book. And that applies to the music, too. Another ‘show about nothing.’ Another seemingly unassuming piece of music that was chosen this time (not commissioned), but ended up becoming the inseparable soundtrack to Larry’s crazy antics. In fact, I dare you to listen to the first three notes (‘BUB-BUB-BUB’) without cracking a silly grin 🙂
The X-Files
This needs no explanation. Because whatever explanation you think you may have- it’s not rational. It’s out of this world. But the truth is out there, so keep at it.
Knight Rider
Again. One or two notes, and you’re there. This one kind of acts like a bridge here too, and is the perfect segue into our next category.
“The one that survived its series”
The Pink Panther
And vice-versa. This one could have belonged in the previous category, if it wasn’t for how overwhelmingly bigger the song became compared to the series. A great example of the perfect theme song here. This was originally written for the first ever Pink Panther live action film. To complement the song during the title sequence, Hawley Pratt and Friz Freleng created a suave, cool cat character. It ended up being so popular with the audience that United Artists commissioned a stand-alone animated series with the cat as its main character.
The Love Boat
How many of you remember a single episode, a single line- heck, a single character from this ‘70s sitcom. But I bet as soon as you hear that first line “Love… exciting and new” you’re 100% there. Not to mention when it hits its cabin fever pitch of “Love boat…” during the chorus.
Mission Impossible
Allegedly written in three minutes, perhaps this is the secret to its enduring success: minimal fiddling around with it might have kept its essence so intact, it’s still a classic to this day. As proved by the subsequent movie franchise. In the great tradition of Bond-like themes, it’ll forever conjure scenes of danger, mystery and bravado.
The A-Team
A clear disciple of the one above, only this time with more ‘heroic’ undertones. What do you remember more: B.A. Baracus’ classic lines, or this opening title theme?
Whatever your answer- ‘Shut up, fool!’
“Slow burners/ mood setters”
The Sopranos
The whole is SO much greater than the sum of its parts here. It’s what TV magic is all about. Individually, neither the song nor the opening sequence are particularly noteworthy. But there’s something about that mundane drive to a mundane part of Jersey over that song that just clicks. The slow build up makes it all the more enjoyable.
Stranger Things
Like the whole show, this one’s an unabashed tribute to the ‘80s. The moody layered synths, the trippy pulsating cadence, the impending doom that emanates from this neon-tinged, UV-lit theme is totally addictive. And it’s absolutely perfect for the series. On a side note- anybody see the “Night Skater” Jaguar ad?
Sounds like Phoenix or Miami Horror had done a collab with the Duffer brothers.
Catch it here.
Breaking Bad
You can just feel the suffocating heat, smell the fumes and hear the rattlesnakes, can’t you? The beauty of ‘mood’ pieces like these, is that they are so damn good at transporting you there. No complex rhythms or distracting vocals here- almost like impressionist art, these are more concerned with capturing and expressing emotion and atmosphere, and that’s what makes them so effective.
Mad Men
I must admit- this one really caught me by surprise. And maybe that’s what makes it work so well. In a show that could have taken SO many opportunities to bank on its rich retro DNA, the theme is contrastingly modern. It was definitely a slow burner for me, but after a few episodes, I just couldn’t conceive of the series without it.
What are your thoughts?
“Unicorns”
These are the top-tier. Rarefied air. They’re phenomenal pieces of music in their own right. They just so happen to be introducing a show that is also a massive critical and commercial hit.
Succession
Inspired by NYC’s history as the birthplace of hip-hop, this tune uses a big, braggadocious beat as its anchor. It’s then layered with a delicate piano riff, and finished with a dramatic string arrangement. The result encapsulates the ‘empire state of mind’ nature of the show, while at the same time evoking a real fragility. The piano and the glass skyscrapers seem to remind us that ‘people who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones’. And the dark, tense undertones of the strings are the perfect accompaniment to an intrigue or a chase. The beat represents the grit and the grind of corporate America, while the classical score brings connotations of privilege, of private education- of uber-wealth. In the words of Kendall Roy- ‘imperial’.
Sex And The City
Yep! Another New Yawker ovah heeeaare! This time, Douglas Cuomo managed to capture the city’s Latin character with a ‘bachelor-pad’, space-age inspired tune that is equal parts sassy, fun, sophisticated and sweet. The true stroke of genius for me is in that last bit of vibraphone & sax duet, when Carrie gets splashed by the bus. It’s dreamy, whimsical, and has a real urban fairytale quality to it, which is one of the series’ main themes.
Game Of Thrones
An outstanding piece of writing here, from the very talented Hans Zimmer alum Ramin Djawadi. The cello’s darker sounds are perfect for what’s about to unfold. The tune evokes an epic journey- a quest in the great Odyssey tradition. A modern classic.
The Simpsons
1989 was quite the year for Danny Elfman. The man composed the score to the movie that would single-handedly change the way we’ve looked at superhero franchises ever since- Batman.
With that notch on his belt, we almost seem to forget that 1989 was also the year he wrote the main title theme to The Simpsons.
What makes it even more significant is that the two couldn’t be further apart from each other. Batman, in all its gothic glory, was a tempestuous, brooding piece that brought the Caped Crusader back to his dark origins.
The Simpsons was a light, playful theme that was inspired by the big American family shows of the 50s and 60s. In many ways, it’s actually a tribute to The Jetsons- even down to how the sequence plays out.
It’s got that magical retro glow, that has somehow managed to transcend the passing of time, while becoming one of the most recognisable theme songs in history.
“Emotional Time Capsules”
Friends
I dare you to listen to that song and not clap 4 times on the first verse like an imbecile, with a big goofy grin on your face and a tiny tear trickling down your cheek.
Ted Lasso
Trust me, this one already made it into the Pantheon. 6 years from now, you’ll find yourself humming “but heaven knows i’ve tried…” with a breathy voice and a knot in your throat. And somehow, that statement will ring even more true in hindsight.
How did Mumford know?! Gosh darn wizard.
Cheers
This bittersweet song is probably the most nostalgia-inducing composition in TV history. ‘Where everybody knows your name’ is exactly the sentiment- like an old friendship- so comfortable and broken in. That sense of belonging has become, through the years, more of a longing– especially in our day and age of digital isolation, loneliness epidemic and Zoom calls.
The Office
It doesn’t matter. Both the US and the UK versions work here, as they carry similar nostalgic undertones in their melodies.
They are also perfect examples of how the overture mimics the show’s themes. The UK version reflects the drier, more cynical brand of humour that came from Ricky Gervais & Stephen Merchant. The US remake on the other hand, has a slightly more upbeat and goofy character, in keeping with the caricaturesque qualities lent by Steve Carell and the writing team. At least, that’s what she said.